Newsletter #32: 2023 in review
The year of the *long* long-form essay
Happy Sunday! Here’s what’s in the newsletter today:
The year of the long long-form essay
Podcasts and recorded conversations
The year in books
And the rest
The year of the long long-form essay
Among my most-read pieces was my critical look at the work of Dr. Bob Schuchts, Sr. Miriam Heidland, and the John Paul II Healing Center. It’s still shocking to me how much Catholic institutions are promoting the work of Schuchts and the JPII Healing Center, which evidences how little we’ve learned from the clergy abuse crisis. But I have a lot of hope in the fact that there’s at least interest in these conversations, and people are starting to find healing from the harm being done by these institutions. With that healing comes resilience and the ability to drive change.
This was the year of the long long-form essay, with the longest being my reflections on some social media drama. I had split that essay into multiple parts, which ended up totaling more than 14,000 words. I’m really proud of that piece, which focused on the work of Luke Burgis and Renee Girard, examining the role that mimetic desire plays in love and conflict, especially conflict on social media. Working through the ideas in that essay fundamentally changed how I show up online.
Other long long-form essays include my review of Catholic teaching and ex-gay ideology and the revival of an old essay from graduate school on the relationship of the family to the rest of society.
And the remainder include:
“Advent and commitments and unions and blessings and marriage,” reflections inspired by the release of Fiducia Supplicans.
“I went to the gala, and I remembered,” a re-exploration of personal traumas and the Catholic Studies department at the University of St. Thomas.
“The Catholic Studies reckoning we never had,” a prequel to the gala piece in which I revisit abuse allegations against one of the esteemed professors of the department.
“Five reflections from Italy,” on the Church, art, faith, and the saints.
Newsletter #31, focusing on what I call “the bullshit rule”.
Newsletter #30, processing “the failure of Side B” and a silly piece by Bethel McGrew in First Things.
“The La La Land Test,” a “love letter to illogical Catholicism”.
Newsletter #29, on scapegoats and a new logo.
Newsletter #28, on MLK Day preaching and the oddity of “Church teaching”.
In total, I published about 60,000 words on the Substack this year, which was significantly less than last year (160,000 words). But I’m proud of what I’ve written, and I hope you’ve found this stuff at least somewhat helpful.
Podcasts and recorded conversations
My year was partly occupied by serving as part of the impact team for the Dear Alana podcast, the tender series by Simon Kent Fung on the life, faith, suffering, sexuality, and death of Alana Faith Chen. I couldn’t be prouder of the work of Simon. The podcast received a number of recognitions over the year, including:
#1 at Apple Podcasts, as well as #1 for New and Noteworthy Podcasts
Editors Choice at Apple Podcasts
Coverage in People, Mother Jones, and a number of other publications
Signal Awards 2023 Silver Winner
I also had the honor of being commissioned to write my first piece for the National Catholic Reporter, a personal review of the podcast.
Dear Alana felt like a triumph in many ways. For years, I’ve been trying to encourage more conversations on conversion therapy, ex-gay ideology, and their influence on Catholicism. I’m very grateful that Simon was able to kick-start some of these conversations through such loving and tender storytelling, and I’m also really grateful to Alana’s family for sharing Alana with the world. Her story is one of tragedy, but I believe that its telling can help provide openings of hope for others.
I was able to record and share some conversations myself this year. My most popular “recorded conversation” for 2023 was my discussion with Danny Peterson, a former Catholic priest who experienced conversion therapy, found himself on Grindr during his priesthood, and eventually had to face the reality of his life so he could find greater integrity and freedom. It was released in three parts. You can listen to part one here, part two here, and part three here.
I also released a recorded conversation with my friend Clare, where we talked about the aftermath of addressing sexual abuse she experienced as a child in her Catholic parish. I asked her whether, knowing now how the community responded, she would choose to come forward again, as well as what she has learned and how she has grown since. I’m proud to have such wonderful and resilient friends, and I’m happy to be able to share a bit of Clare’s story with all of you.
The year in books
According to myyearinbooks.com, my “reading vibes” for 2023 were: eclectic.
I read 6 Shakespeare plays, two conversion therapists’ works of pious sentimentalism, a horror novel, and books on race, trauma, grief, eating, sexuality, Christianity, and more.
Here are ten books I’d recommend from the last year (you can go to my Instagram page for a chance to win a free copy of one of these books):
Honorable mention goes to Renee Girard’s A Theater of Envy: William Shakespeare, which I’ve been reading since December of 2022. I’m about halfway through. The text is a collection of essays by Girard on mimetic desire, envy, and the work of Shakespeare. I’ve never considered myself a great reader of Shakespeare, and Girard’s text has been an opportunity to revisit the playwright’s work. Because each essay focuses on a different play, I’ve used it as an opportunity to make my way through Shakespeare’s work.
My process has been as follows: Before I start an essay from A Theater of Envy, I study a synopsis of the relevant play to gain familiarity (or re-familiarize myself) with the plot. I read the essay and take note of key questions or concerns that Girard explores. And then I read that play, taking note of the dynamics outlined in the essay. It’s been a sort of course on Shakespeare, facilitated by Girard’s text. 10/10 recommend this approach. You’ll probably hear about this again at the end of next year.
The professional life, and the rest
Outside of writing and social media, for those of you who may be wondering, life has been going quite well.
I got a big job promotion this year, have learned a lot about driving change in large complex institutions, and have gotten every penny’s worth out of therapy. Two professional projects I led received big awards this year: an industry award for leading innovations in governance and compliance, and the highest business award in my company for driving transformation in diversity and inclusion.
But one of my biggest professional achievements this year is one of my employees telling me that, of all the jobs she’s had over her career, this is the job where she feels she can be her fullest self at work. I don’t write very much about my professional life here, but I just want to share that it’s been a big year professionally, and a lot of what I’ve learned through this space has really helped me succeed professionally. Many people have shared their struggles to relate to the Church institutionally, and I’ve heard hundreds of stories over the last couple of years about how the Church has failed as an employer and minister. These stories have directly benefited me and my work team, as I seek to use what I’ve learned from all of you in my own role as a leader at work. Thank you so much to all of you who have shared and who are making the world a better place, simply by speaking up.
As the year progressed, there were many moments that felt really difficult and overwhelming. But, looking back, I’d characterize this as a very good year. I wish you all the best as you celebrate the close of 2023, and I look forward to the year ahead with you all.